As such the first thing they will do is describe their definite works, which are their prized possessions they have gathered up this time from the same words they have always used. Although when they feel like being nice, these words change from evil to more broad forms of reality. This is often when they spend time doing normal things that interest them. Below are both words which take up their works in mood or boredom.
- Trixie -> Drugs = Chememes
- Leon -> Pride = Politics
- Scarlet -> Lust = Beauty
- Mazer -> Evil = Nihilism
As such each of their works, specified to shadows are written below, beginning with Trixie:
Chememes of nightmares
These are all the chemes gathered by myself in the past of this work, which while not all I know of contains the whole first part before and after both episodes of madness and further contain latter parts after the psychosis has ended. It also features future portions that take place after this past years later.
We evidently won't be using them all, but we will be using the scary and dark ones significantly within this part designed to experiment with art, as Trixie can paint and she wishes to create frightful imagery which shall scare some people.
As a result, I will show what she created ( by that I mean me, Mazer playing with his imaginary friends, cause I'm crazy and an author. Although I've met many of them in my dreams )
Withdrawall: The sights, hidden behind a wall and the thorn and agony left in wake. Those horrors only some can see that can be described but are left to mystery best left not known even to curious.
Hell Inside: We know that hell is found inside can be seen when asked and even furthered in opening portals to its larger world. But Alas what is on the outside, if this still is all but the inside?
These are but two examples which we shall keep as the full of this works example and move on to the work of Leon who is in the moment, that of Pride:
Opinions of Horrors
Unlike previous occasions, Leon will not focus on clothing which allows for different styles and rather tackle the most important part of a person, the mind, which is the pride of all people and thus in this part Leon will show these common opinions for what they are then steal them away such that they become new in form, rather then attached to the opinion which it sprung from:
- Atheism = The one who doesn't think their is hope left in reality at all.
- Theism = The one who has abandonned the reasons for the lies of faith.
- Agnosticism = The one who can't tell if it is this way or that, afraid.
- Proveism = The one who cast away reality for the dreams they harboured.
These are the four cardinal views which have been reaped and will be further detailed below as new ones born from the nature of another but still in pains separate from the ones which are here written.
- Hopelessness = The view that their is only the futile left in life, with all that has come about being but tragedy to be fought with more and within it still only more tragedy of times come.
- Buffoonery = The view that their is no reason to believe in reason and that one can do literally anything by simply believing they did and doing nothing about the reality of circumstance.
- Uncertainty = The one who sees too many options and is trapped in undecision who can't know if it is this way or that and can't decide in fear of wrong, so has been wondering for years.
- Invian = The one who no longer lives in reality but has receded only to mind alone and fled existence for fantasies which have no bearing on external, no longer seeing the outside at all.
Now these four perspectives shall be handed to the images that Trixie created to further their interpretation, which in them is the only root to deeper still which we will find at this stories end. As human evil is not like that of a Dog Deman and is one perhaps worse in some manners.
Withdrawall + Hopelessness + Uncertainty : When in withdrawal one is both hopeless and uncertain. They know neither hope of better days or better yesterdays and know further no certainty in that path of life or that path of doing today. Often left to laying there waiting for fleeting light.
Hell Inside + Buffoonery + Invian : We think we know much of life, we see things and feel things but all of this is inside, where we believe these things truth and further we find ourselves living out fantasies that are not even in externalization what is outside that external or internal part dwelling.
Then we move on to Scarlet who will do the work of these things above made deeper:
Unification of Glamour
Here she will firstly blend the works of Leon and Trixie in the other direction, meaning she will take what is two and form it so that it is one, then she shall create that Glamour of the species which lives in this space of mind and matter.
This is that which is the blending of the philosophy and art above, which forms a third image and the further key of those knowledge made twice written, this we write as one below:
The agony which we feel when behind the wall, is not inside the wall but rather is outside itself as is its opposite which neither is known by ignorance. These languages are not described in a manner of truth but mirror of them in natural. Our mind writes that these are neither naturals and are then external to the inside, but that makes them of extremities of either end and so are seen as unlike what is lost and found nowhere now, in that it shattered the part of normal inside, to that which is always outside.
In translation I am saying that Meth withdrawal and its effect are outside the inside that is what we know as Hell or Heaven and as a result is not describable to a person who has not felt it. As it cuts one off from the normal and leaves you with two new experiences which are outside reality as humanity sees it. This might sound cool, but my happy and sad are now based of the outside and not what is inside. So if I don't eat meth, I don't feel good ever and if I do I feel great always. This is unlike the inside, where it depends entirely off how life is for you.
I cannot go back to the inside now, my happiness is on the outside because when I took meth it severs the line of what is inside and forces it to only be found on the outside. This is means I am now stuck being a person who literally has to go out and collect and buy his pleasure, instead of having it normally for free. I don't think a person would want that unless they felt it had a benefit like the one I found. It's only good is in it making me think of the only consequence.
While the Glamour has been fashioned it is revealed with the one who wears it, Mazer himself:
This is me, Mazer the otter. Who does sometimes have longer hair.
The otter is different from the dog deman in barely any way, in fact their virtually identical while calling themselves something else. The thing about Otters is that what they eat gets them high and this is true even for literal otters, who eat oysters. What I'm getting at is that an otter likes oysters because the entire experience is a high for them including the withdrawal from a chemical similar in the otters case to THC. This is a fact of Oysters and it's cause of their testicles.
The reason I bring this up is that as an Otter, I like the withdrawal even though it makes me feel gross and as though in pain. What bothers me about it is that I basically just sit there and masturbate with less pleasure, while off the drug and can't do this work for more then 15 minutes without feeling exhausted. The part that makes it an issue for me, is if I were to be forced to stop, because I didn't want to and was forced to, I will have cravings for it constantly and these will be the least fun part that drove me nuts last week.
The craving to no end is like wanting candy but never having it again for at worst your whole life. It does stop eventually, but then your left with just the unpleasant side of the drug and know you could have had more fun outside the consequence you put yourself through. It also makes time seem slower when off it, so that week felt like ages of life.
So this, which blended with my lack of self control is why...
I haven't actually slept since Friday and likely will not be able to until tomorrow morning, as I realize that is very unhealthy and further I realized after three days ( as its 6 in the evening on sunday ), that I can't stop taking it if I have it. This will only, without sleep make the circumstance worse, when I run out and thus I need to sleep for as long as I can after I come off it. As you can't sleep on this stuff.
I will do my best this time, to not take more until I've had rest, as it's bound to happen anyways when the drug can't keep up with the exhaustion its hiding and seemingly making me feel wide awake. However even the withdrawal can lead to occasions of insomnia and thus I may not sleep till noon tomorrow.
Although I'll go to bed when I start to feel tired. It basically fucks with your incentives and is why it is helpful for me as a reason for not being a dick externally where I can now consider one consequence.
I keep talking about it cause I talked about it and I don't want to influence someone to make what is mostly a wrong choice. I don't recommend it to anyone even when it gives me an incentive to live by.
Just a picture of Dog Deman languages to finish up the post.
I was going to make this about the Cardinals of the Decourt too, but that is my next post.
I was going to make this about the Cardinals of the Decourt too, but that is my next post.
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